Huathe. As the May blossom cascades from the Hawthorn, there is protection and sanctuary to be found for those brave enough to draw close to her thorns.
Traditionally associated with healing of the physical heart, she reaches out too with a potent balm for healing of the inner heart, the emotional core of our being. She may pierce us with her thorns, but it is in order that she might draw us in for healing.
A safe place when we are in need of refuge.
A place where we can learn her boundaries.
Are you brave enough to embrace her thorns for healing? She would like to offer you her balm, too.
Balm for your heart. Your soul.
This post is in gratitude to Bear, who has walked with me longer than I knew.
Bear came to me around 5 years ago in a shamanic journey/meditation. When I trained in Reiki Drum a couple of years ago 2 male black Bear came to me.
Today in therapy I faced up to some truly sadistic behaviour from my parents as a child. Bear came and flanked me on either side as I worked through this, leading me gently away and above a body in extreme pain.
Bear communicated he had been with me then, had been with me throughout my life. My sense of gratitude to Bear is deeper than any words can express. Thank you Bear.
I have found much to inspire me at The Path of She, having first come across Karen via her book ‘Tale of the Lost Goddess’, the story of a womans search for meaning in her life, and the journey inwards and her meeting with Hecate.
Today Karen shared a powerful meditation for meeting and uniting with the Green Man, the lover god. The meditation can be found here
Tonight I will delve deeply into this.
Karen has also written with great honesty and integrity about her first encounter with Him for Witches & Pagans, also worth a read for the Beltane Mysteries.
May your Beltane be blessed with the joy of Him.
In preparation for the New Moon tomorrow, I harvested the essence from my wee Ash (Nuin) Ogham. An essence of deep integration, Nuin offers balance and integration; a place where physical and spiritual meet, past and present.
How I experienced the harvesting of this essence was of a pull deep within my hara and solar plexus areas; a pull inwards, but which then extended outwards into my aura.
In unprocessed trauma the past remains present, and I sensed a reaching from this essence into all the yet dissociated emotional parts of me, a call for them to become integrated within me.
A few months ago I harvested the essence from a lovely, very gracious Ash who dwells across the field from where I live. She is Flo-Ash, a tree who offered me comfort and an outlet for grief when a beloved dog of mine died. So Ash/Nuin is about integration of emotions, from the past and the present.
Tonight I send the Ogham-Nuin essence newly harvested out to those in search of integration of emotions, and of integration of dissociated parts of their being. With Nuin I know this work, this deeper integration, is truly possible.
This is a truly powerful piece from Northerntamarisk which fully deserves a wider sharing. She draws deeply from the well of a tradition not her own, the wellsprings of the Carmelite path of the Dark Night of the Soul and the desert which blossoms, to reach deeper into the heart of her own path of devotion.
I am struck once again by how, in deep contemplation, the path to interfaith dialogue can be forged, and how, at the heart of all, there is a true sense of Oneness expressed through rich diversity.
Source: When the masks fall we meet Them as we Are
Last month, Fearn (Alder) accompanied me as a warrior in remembering the past, facing further emerging memories of childhood abuse.
Today I harvested Saille (Willow) from my ogham. She greeted me with an unequivocal message: the deeper the pain, the deeper the trauma, the more we allow our emotions to carve out the inner depths of our being, the ever greater capacity for healing we have. Tough love from a truly beautiful tree.
Saille generally is about intuition, emotion, sexuality, trauma, and physical illness caused by trauma. Martyn Pentecost gives us this message from Saille:
‘Never underestimate the value of who you are…My essence will help you to heal, to alleviate pain and dis-ease…My magic reminds you that you are an amazing person…Be exactly who you are and always cherish your uniqueness.’
(Martyn Pentecost, The Little Book of Celtic Reiki Wisdom, mPowr Publishing 2015).
It seems we have to plunge ever deeper within to emerge into the fullness of who we are, which is our gift to the world. Sending this powerful essence out now to those who need it.
Today, at this New Moon, I harvested an essence from my Fearn Ogham.
She is very much the Spiritual Warrior, possessed of Fire, of the clarity to see and face truths previously avoided.
Fearn is traditionally associated with both Fire and Water, but my wee ogham embodies Fire predominantly.
Before harvesting, I was torn as to whether to stay with the Graves order, or to follow the order I learnt while studying with OBOD (the Order of Bards Ovates and Druids). I was drawn to the latter, sensing the need of this powerful warrior in facing what has been avoided, of knowing Her strength.
Ogham-Fearn is now sent out to all those who need this strength, as well as to those already embracing her in their lives.
A dark place
Trees tower above me, sheltering, shielding
A glimpse of antler
I am protected.
Yesterday I shared a powerful healing Sacred Meal with an Interfaith Minister friend of mine.
It was largely to share within ritual space some of my journey with emerging memories of MDSA as a child. To share healing. To place this trauma in the hands of the One who is my Source, the One to whom I will return, and the One who is my Light along the way.
We blessed each others bodies with salt water. Blessed my lovely Brighid statue, which I surrounded with my Northern Tamarisk beads and gems sacred to Brighid.
I shared my emerging memories in the form of a litany of grief: grief for the girl raped by her adoptive mother; grief for the girl who was made to experience oral sex at such a young age; grief for the girl who nearly died at her mothers hands; grief as well for a father unwittingly coerced into more covert sexual abuse.
These memories, written on a piece of paper, were placed along with my vows made into the hands of Brighid at Imbolc under her statue.
I am grateful for the sacred friendship offered. For a true Anam Cara. For the possibility of healing.
February 2nd is the anniversary of my first vows as a Carmelite nun back in 1990 and for the last few years I have marked this anniversary with my own, somewhat alternative, vows.
Holding my little Brighid statue today it was very simple:-
To honour myself as woman
To reclaim my body from my mother
To embrace my true sexuality as it emerges